Life after Death
That’s the title of the latest podcast at This American Life - episode 359. In it, there are three stories about three different men who’s life changed after encountering death around them. Of which, the second story was one that struck a chord as I listened.
Everyone told Darin Strauss that there would have been no way to avoid hitting the bicyclist who swerved into the path of his car. When the girl died, the police said Darin wasn’t at fault. Darin tells the story of what it’s like to live with being the accidental cause of someone’s death.
I’ve uploaded that portion of the story here. Do have a listen before you continue reading after the jump.
One thing that struck me, right at the end is this - IF ever (hopefully not), I get into an accident, and one that I am innocent and I killed someone, how will I react? How do one get through life after such an incident?
In the papers, you’ll always read an article or two about some fatal traffic accident, may it be accidental or through some mistake of either party. If its the driver’s fault, he’ll usually go to prison or fine and be banned from driving. If not, it’ll be categorised as an accidental death and it will just be another notch in the statistic. But seldom we get to know what happens beyond that.
Listening to that episode made me wonder as I walked out of the train station. Being a driver for 13 years, I’ve pretty much a clean record, except for 3 accidents which thankfully, hurt no one except the cars and my ego. After that, I’ve decided that there’s no point to rush - I’m just endangering myself and whoever else is on the road…(also the fact that you can’t really cheong with a Hyndai Getz). I do have to admit, I’m sometimes not the saint on the road as I hope to be, but I try to keep to speed limit as much as possible.
But shit do happen. Like a pedestrian that decides to step out, or like in the podcast, the cyclist strays onto the road. I wonder how much of this burden I can carry as I lived my life.
In the article from the Washingtonian mentioned at the end of that segment - Fatal Accidents: I Never Saw Him, wrote that quite a fair bit of people who were involved in fatal accidents and who think they were innocent, developed post-traumatic stress disorder as they tried to make sense of the accident.
As quoted by Edward J Hickling who wrote the book Overcoming the Trauma of Your Motor Vehicle Accident
Someone who falls asleep at the wheel knows what they can do to prevent future accidents. Innocent drivers, Hickling says, realize they’re at the mercy of the universe.
If you have personal experience to share, feel free to post in the comments section. I’d really like to know.
On a less morbid note. I do recommend listening to This American Life podcast. As the title suggest, it does talk a fair bit of being an American and life in the big US of A, but there are certain stories that cross national boundaries, like the one I put up here. Some are funny, some are touching and some are eye-opening about life in general. Highly recommended.
Subscribe to it via iTunes for a weekly episode or go to the website and stream past episodes … for those using Safari, click on Window->Activity and look for the window that’s streaming. Click on the MP3 link there and press Cmd-C and then open your Download window and Cmd-V to start downloading…and you get it to listen to it offline!
update - Darin Strauss on doing that piece on This American Life.
Tagged as itunes, podcast, this american life + Categorized as life
thanks! Glad you enjoyed the piece… it was hard to do, but I thought it might help other people who had similar situations… -ds
You can truly rest now, Darin Strauss! I know and believe the universe to be fully orchestrated by only GOOD intentions - by a Creator who is in FULL control. My mother died instantly in a “no fault” accident at her age of 30 (I was 10). Only a few months later, my dad was on duty as a sheriff’s deputy, when someone flew through a red light, striking my dad’s unit, giving him injuries that took his 32-yr-old life only months later. I honestly do NOT blame the guy who blew the red light for killing my dad. My father came to know Jesus and God through this terrible accident, passed this truth/hope to his 4 kids, then died at home 5 weeks later. Because of his death, his cardiologist (who did 2 open heart surgeries on the ruptured aorta) felt as if he was responsible for losing his first young adult patient. This pushed the cardiologist to his knees and he allowed Christ to be his advocate, God to be his wonderful, loving Father. Now, thousands have come to know God through the catalyst of my father’s death. THIS IS A TRUE SPIRITUAL HEALING ON THE EARTH! And the guy who flew through the red light was allowed to be part of such a wonderfully-orchestrated healing! I would hug this man; hope he would live the rest of his days on earth in FULL liberty and joy - free of bondage and remorse! You deserve the same! You do NOT have to live the life of 2 humans; instead, you get to receive the consolation and reward of 2! You deserve it!
Also, my father’s death paid for me to attend college to receive a B.S. in Nutrition, and I’m almost finished with a Master’s. I honor my father with my learning and my hospital career! Life truly is good…so is God!
P.S. - Darin, I failed to note that my mother was the mysterious victim of her accidental auto accident, like the young lady in your story. Interestingly, my mother had consistently spoken of dying and wanting to kill herself during the 5 years previous to her accident. All of her family/friends wondered if she “tried” to swerve her car the way she did - an intentional swerve? But strangely, law enforcement & medical personnel said she could have NEVER planned a pole to shoot through her head the way it did, causing instant brain death. So they deemed it a true accidental fatality. And even at 10 years old, I felt the higher spirit realm saying, “She wanted to go and she got her wish granted; this was a good thing for herself, her children, the earth - her internal chaos was too great for her to conquer.”
And only 3 years ago, in our small mountain community, a 22-yr-old woman phoned her mother the night before her auto death and told her she didn’t belong on the earth and that she felt she would die in an auto accident very soon. The next day, a drunken driver rammed into her car and killed her. This young woman was NOT at fault, yet she DID want to leave the earth and felt her time was soon coming.
The spirit realms of life are SO MUCH higher and deeper than the physical realm! Even at 10 years of age, and having recently been taken away from my mother by the courts due to her mental/psychological instability, I KNEW she was supposed to leave, no matter how that was to happen. Though she mysteriously died in that accidental auto incident, she got her deepest desire granted inadvertently.
I am now 45 years old - and though my parents’ deaths sentenced me to very abusive foster & adoptive living situations for an entire decade, I am a MUCH sturdier and loving and resilient and compassionate human being because of ALL OF IT! Now, I can foster the most injured, grieved, and abused children of all - and very successfully!
Peace and truth and deep love to you!
Thanks, Debbie. I really appreciate your kind words. -ds
but there are certain stories that crosses national boundaries Watch your subject-verb agreement or your typing. Stories cross.
erm thanks Ann for the correction.
But honestly, do you do that often … picking up people’s grammatical errors?